Cower Inside and Avoid the Sun

Even though it’s June, which means the beginning of summer for Northern Americans, there’s no reason to step outside. Literally everything bad happens outside. You can be hit by a car. You can be mugged. You can catch a viral infection.

Stay inside. Better yet, if you have curtains or shades, roll those things down and create a dark, cavernous vibe in your house, dorm, or apartment. You want to shun the light from entering your private space. You need all the room you can get for music and television and computers and reading and writing and painting and passivity in all of its forms.

You know what else happens when you go outside? You get heat stroke. You get sunburned. Both of these lead to cancer, which means both of these lead to death. I think sacrificing hours of Vitamin D doses is worth not dying, don’t you?

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